Recently Updated: 02.13.08
Previously Updated: 10.12.03
The Slushpile
Or, best left forgotten
The hubris of youth was alive and well in me. It probably still is, because even now, I continue to bill myself as some sort of writer. But then I look back at what I wrote in the past and I am flabbergasted, utterly flabbergasted, at how seriously I took it all. You can sense some of that in these capsule summaries that I wrote about some of those writings. These summaries were about 4 years ago, which doesn't seem like such a long time, unless you're 25 years old and you wrote these when you were 21, Now that's a lifetime.
Unfortunately, as of this writing, I have yet to migrate the stories listed below from the Diaryland server, where the original AFL blog was actually located. But you can read the capsules for yourself and then judge whether or not I should resurrect them or let them rest in password-protected peace.
Oh, and I don't care if you steal Breath and Soul, which doesn't even have a password. It was a piece of shit. It came about because some guy dumped me. Rare is the good writing that has sprung from that sort of thing...
The following material is dated 10.12.03
Ah yes. I love walking through San Francisco, especially on a crisp Fall day. Everyone's necks are wrapped up in plush, sophisticated scarves. Tourists are rushing in and out of the Union Square stores and trying to catch a ride on the trolly. Street bums perform songs and play music as sophisticated (and sometimes very effective) forms of panhandling. What a wonderful inspiration for writing, and I often am inspired. Sometimes I'll find myself at a cafe, writing in my journal. Or maybe some random diner, dealing with a waitress who is dealing with not wanting to be there. And by the end of the day, I'll have produced pages and pages of words all motivated by the romanticism of my surroundings.
And none of that shit has amounted to anything, mainly because not all of the writings I've produced were serious undertakings. Even though it's practically been my lifelong dream to be published, most of what I write isn't publishable, or else I've never had much confidence in what I've written.
Included on this page is one piece of work that is one piece of writing that I actually did seriously consider submitting for publication. But copy you see here isn't even a proper manuscript. Since I was so happy to have finally finished it, I made five copies of it (for my friends to read and review) and proudly dubbed it a "Pre-Submission Copy". It's am amateurish thing to do, but hey, we've all gotta take our own baby steps.
Any writer worth her salt should be proud of all the writings she's produced. Personally, I've never had the urge to ball up anything I've written and then toss it in the trash. (Mostly I just take whatever I'm embarassed about and hide it in some dusty corner of my room.) It's always a good time to look back at these writings years later to see how far you've progressed, if you have at all. I think I've definitely progressed since at least my high school days. I'm less wordy, although I'm actually still working on that. (Just see my lengthy high school essays and papers for comparison!)
In this section, I present to you my Slushpile. In the publishing world, the Slushpile is basically a pile (har har) of manuscripts that will probably never see the light of the bestseller list. Here, these works are not works that I've necessarily rejected personally. "Slushpile" is just an umbrella term for these past works, works that could all one day lead up to a serious published manuscript.
Poetry
Fiction
- The Best Chances of My Life
May 8, 2000
Still in the midst of teenage angst, I wrote this alternate reality story to explore the effects that small decisions can have on life. In the alternate reality, life in middle school becomes so depressing that I try to commit suicide. As a result, I end up regularly seeing a therapist and looking back at the events of my life, which include my dad's affair with another woman, an undeveloped friendship with Jason, and a chance meeting with Lauren, who I never become friends with.
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/000508_44.html
- A Deep Expression of the Heart
June 21, 2001
This semi-fictitious season finale takes place in the year 2036. AACF has become a leading national spiritual organization, and Dan and Carrie are happily married with kids. But Dan has been stricken with a debilitating illness and the only one with the cure is Darren, who has moved to the moon and become power mad. Forced to confront Darren, I eventually obtain the drug. But instead of administering it to Dan, I decide to stop him from getting it altogether by traveling back in time. But my mission has a self-serving purpose too: I want to stop myself from ever meeting Jake.
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/010621_91.html
- Goodnight, Sweet Prince
December 29, 2001
WE'RE ALL ALIEN CARBON COPIES~!!!! RUN~!!! RUN FOREST RUN~!!!
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/011229_83.html
- Persons X
January 10, 2002
In this limited edition series, Milo and Imogene are two college students descended from a long line of agents that created and maintain a top-secret government espionage agency. For ten episodes, the agents must balance their patriotic duties with keeping normal lives, which includes going to school and a developing intimacy between one another. Among the stories involved in this arc: a crazed terrorist uses zombies to try and take over San Francisco; Domingo, Milo's father, returns from a long absence only to reveal a disturbing secret; Imogene confronts an opportunity to see her long-dead mother; and Milo's life becomes fractured into three very different realities.
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/020111_74.html
- The Sweet Hereafter
May 13, 2002
Sometime in the near future, a successful author, husband and father is on his way to celebrate his fifth wedding anniversary. But before he can celebrate in the present, he gets the chance of a lifetime: to right a heartbreaking wrong from the past.
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/020513_15.html
- Missing
May 23, 2002
In this three part-mini series, Sam Hunter must investigate the conspiracy surrounding the brutal murder of her husband, a top-level scientist in a San Francisco biotech firm. Her closest friend and confidant provides her with details about the conspiracy, but only after revealing a shocking truth about himself. In the meantime, Sam must keep careful guard of her young son and evade the watchful eyes of those involved with the conspiracy.
http://penmaster.diaryland.com/020523_15.html
Manuscript
- Breath and Soul
Fall 2002
Breath and Soul is a love story bookended by a chronicle of depression. What happens when the dark hopelessness of the soul intersects with the promise of love?
It's practically a miracle that Chase Young has survived terrifying mood swings and lapses into deep depression ever since high school. With the start of college and the continued, even heightened, intensity of these dark emotions, it becomes increasingly clear that Chase is going through more than just the angsty motions of growing pains.
Enter Aaron Sammler, an aspiring filmmaker whose charm and charisma sweeps Chase away. Will Aaron become the white night that Chase has always longed for? More importantly, does Aaron even want the job?
breathonline.doc (255KB)
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